The end.

Have you ever thought about how you would kill yourself? Yeah, nobody wants to hear that. Nobody wants to hear about how depressed you are and how much you life sucks, but I'm gonna write about it. I would kill myself by overdosing on pills. I haven't done my research just yet, but if I was going to, I would find something that would just fuck me up til i fell asleep and just never woke up. Sounds drastic, but is it really? I believe in Heaven, so maybe I would just be doing myself and everyone around me a favor if I just went up and straight killed myself. You don't know how many times I've thought about it, but it just seems to permanent. Once you do it, there's no turning back. No second chances. But life is just so difficult. It really is. All I will ever have out of life is my sister, and even we fight. I have put myself out there and given my all and failed miserably with the one I thought I loved. When I finally try and get past that, my own mom won't talk to me and doesn't even want me to come home. Nobody wants me, so what's the point? I just want a second chance. I just want to restart my entire life, and maybe things will turn out right then. But nobody ever knows, so what's one to do? Hell if I know. I don't want to keep living day by day, wondering what shit life is going to throw at me next. I want to know everything's going to be okay, that everything will turn out right at the end of the day. Yes, I try to be optimistic. But I just want to know. I want to know what is going to happen, what purpose my life is going to have. But I will never know. What is the end? When is it coming? Who can answer my questions? Nobody. Nobody can.